Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Pole dances with wolves

Is this a trend? I've spotted display advertising for dancers in the Saipan Tribune twice this week. Not those classified snippets that real job hunters ignore, but honest-to-goodness ads in the front of the paper.

I'm interested. NEED A JOB AND MONEY DAILY??? Yep, that's me. 50% commission daily and the tips are all mine. But wait: 21 years old to 28 years old. Isn't that against the law? Can I call the EEOC?

Maybe I'd have more luck at the second place. Besides, it's a sports bar, so I'm sure the dancing would be more artistic. What? TWA's only? Now I'm really pissed off.

What I'm saying, not too subtly, is that we know what they're looking for. You just can't come out and say it in print these days.


I've led a sheltered life lately, so help me out here. It seems like all of the dancers are from the mainland via Guam or from the Philippines. Is that true? If so, I'm just wondering why.

While I'm exposing my ignorance, I thought the P.I. didn't let people exit if their job category was Dancer.


I lost interest in those places well before I got married. There's not much thrill in seeing someone who would obviously rather be somewhere else watch herself chew gum in the mirror.

Sorry, but the stripping I've seen here is like Lindsay Dee Lohan trying to be Marilyn Monroe. Thanks for the mammaries, but you have no talent.

I may have forgotten others, but the only club I remember trying to choreograph a show and even be mildly entertaining was the old Kimchi Cabana in Oleai. They weren't X-rated, really not even R. More like a PG-13, which may be why I'd sometimes see a DeLorean parked off to the side.

Exit pole

I'm ready to jump (and slam my heels on the stage) on this if it's a trend.

I'm thinking Amateur Night. That is, if I can convince my wife. Now, if I can just jury-rig a pole through the hanging ceiling.


Jeff said...

"I lost interest in those places well before I got married. There's not much thrill in seeing someone who would obviously rather be somewhere else watch herself chew gum in the mirror."

Great line. I feel exactly the same. And in general, nothing is a greater turn off than gum chewing.

Jeff said...

Also, don't know if that email on your profile is still active, but I sent you one.

Bruce A. Bateman said...

I had the same reaction to the ad, Ken. I thought about applying myself and protesting through Equal Opportunity should I not be hired.

Problem is, I don't chew gum. They may have me there.

Visions of Nancy Sinatra in polyester dress and vinyl boots singing "These Gums are made for Chawin'"

SteeleOnSaipan said...

That's pretty funny dude. I've been banned from entering the clubs since my bachelor party but haven't heard anything about dancers here coming from the U.S. or Guam. There's only a few places left.

bigsoxfan said...

My sources (b-2) tell me there won't be any more Mongolians or Russians after a month or so. Business down is my local experts opinion. On a totally unrelated topic Three Mongolians decided to pick the Doctors pocket the other afternoon, after our usual meeting. They were a little surprised by the violence of his reaction. Shouldn't asked a stripper.

bigsoxfan said...

oops, insert "should have" where I place shouldn't. Get off my lap, pmpkn and stop friggin with the keys.

Ken, I had to take the wife's address of the web page. Too much lottery winner crap, etc.. I put her sister's email address in a comment and she is getting the same crap we are. Damned spammers..